Empirically-verifiable fondling of a social worker in a village hall orgy context has always been problematical. There are times when peer-reviewed perversions can become difficult, if not socially maladroit. The orgy situation is – of course – a prime example of such a situation. This is why it is considered very impolite to break off from proceedings, say in the middle of orally stimulating a cake shop manageress, or oiling a small furry mammal of your choice, in order to fill-in the necessary details on one’s orgy card.
However, these days we discover that one now has to complete the necessary questionnaire given out at the start of the orgy by the village council’s representative to ensure that the orgy meets the exacting diversity standards set out by the government. For the government now seems to believe that rural sexual perversions are not racially, ethnically or religiously diverse enough to ensure that they are representative of the ethnic population as a whole. This is despite the fact that if you go back far enough into the records – about two or three generations in the main – you will discover that the overwhelming majority of Little Frigging denizens are – in that great and noble rural tradition – closely related to one another*.
*Very closely in the case of Grand Uncle Stagnant – who not only happens to be his own brother, but he is also – apparently – his mother’s great aunt as well.