Wednesday, November 18, 2009

The LFITW Woodland Perversions Institute

But even if you do know the correct way to attach the turbo-weasel to you fetish utility belt without entangling it unnecessarily in your perversion webbing, that doesn’t mean that you are anywhere near being an adept at woodland perversions. For there is far more to a full understanding of woodland perversions than knowing which way is north and how to safely undress a sub postmistress in a bramble thicket.

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By way of example, it takes many years of practice to deploy successfully the fresh cream cakes essential for the fully perverse experience in a woodland environment without suffering some form of collateral damage to the integrity of your cream horn.

That is why we here at The Little Frigging In The Wold Woodland Perversions Institute offer a three-week intensive residential school that covers all the essentials for becoming a successful and fully-experienced woodland sexual deviant. Those who successfully complete the course are awarded the Certificate in Advanced Woodland Perversion, and a badge that can be sewn onto their fetish utility belt and/or perversion webbing in order to demonstrate their accredited prowess to all interested parties at their next orgy or other outdoor perversion event.

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