It is a stirring, and often proudly upstanding, sight to see the massed ranks of the Little Frigging In The Wold Free-Form All-Nude Marmalade Besmirching Team as they make their way down the village High Street in their annual parade.
The annual parade of the Little Frigging In The Wold Free-Form All-Nude Marmalade Besmirching Team is a local tradition dating back – some say – way beyond the introduction of the stereo LP, and, could - quite possibly – date back to even before the days of colour photograph, to the times when – as we all know – everything was in black and white.
Of course, marmalade besmirching is itself a long-standing rural tradition; especially in its all-nude form (obviously it is sometimes not quite so long-standing on the chillier days). It is – therefore – always a great honour to be one of those lucky enough to be chosen to be besmirched by the application of fresh marmalade to the nether regions, by the Little Frigging In The Wold Free-Form All- Nude Marmalade Besmirching Team.
Obviously, these public – and it goes without saying, pubic - displays always attract a large crowd, especially in the tourist season when the ladies of the Little Frigging In The Wold Free-Form All- Nude Marmalade Besmirching Team are ready to put some of their finer points on display for the edification of the massed ranks of tourists.
So, if you feel the slightest desire to have all you hold dear besmirched with marmalade by some of the deftest exponents of the art, then by all means come along to Little Frigging In The Wold for a marmalade besmirching you will never forget for as long as you have the strength in your wrists.