Monday, December 14, 2009

The Size of Chins

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So, anyway, what size chin do you have?

There is no string next to the lime jelly, but - on the bright side - we have located - and laughed at all of the laughable things in the precinct. We have seen your unashamedly Tory trousers and made many a mock of them. Now I have to ask, is that the only goat you have as a friend?

Don't go down there. It is far too dark for a lady of your pulchritude and inherent wasp avoidance abilities. I confess I have seen your knickers. Oh, all right… yes…. I'll admit it. I have worn them too.

However, put it away now. We have all seen enough of it.

But do not touch those things over there. Those are not the devices we would use to change the socks of any toad maintenance engineer of our acquaintance. We have not dared to use them for such purposes for many a decade. Is that how you would change the socks of your best friend?

I have touched it.

I have smelt it.

I have tasted it.

I want to do it all again.

Twice.

At least.

Go now, though, it is beginning to throb again.

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