Monday, February 22, 2010

A Stick

Here we are now. So, what do you think of that Then?

No, not that…. This?

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No, it is not just an ordinary stick. This is… this is an authentic hairstylist herder's Stick. It is mainly used to separate the hairstylists from the shampoo and conditioner if they seem to be getting over-excited by the wide range of available products, and they start to babble drivel and nonsense like those very hairstyling product adverts that infest the advertising breaks of commercial television like a head lice epidemic in an infant school.

The special attachment on the Stick, that to the untrained eye looks rather like an inexpertly lopped branch, about 7.1982 inches from the top (or Other End as it is known to the cognoscenti) is an essential part of the hairstylist herder's Stick. It is used to pry curlers out of the grasp of unwilling hairstylists who may be - in their typical naïve way - planning something dangerous or disruptive, it is also used for moving perming materials out of the reach of any over-stimulated hairstylist. It may all sound harmless, but remember the untold damage caused by that sudden uncontrollable and highly contagious bubble perm outbreak of the late 70s/early 80s. It spread like wildfire from footballers - notably prone to unfortunate hairstylings (possibly due to some genetic weakness in the footballing breed) - through glam rock popsters and out into the public at large.

Fortunately, the epidemic has now been brought under control, even in Liverpool, but the danger still remains. So vigilance in these matters is still of the utmost importance. Hence, the value - even in these technological times - of the hairstylist herder's Stick.

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