Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Time For Tea And Strumpets

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After a hard day firtling your tranklements, there is nothing nicer than to wend your way home for a batch of hot-buttered strumpets and a nice cup of tea. There is nothing nicer than having a brace, or more, of hot-buttered strumpets disporting themselves across your kitchen table, or even your fireside hearth, when you come inside from the cold of a typical British sunny day, or if soaking wet from the heavy rain during what the weather forecaster solemnly promised would be an ideal day for a short trip outdoors.

Anyway, the hot-buttered strumpets can prove invaluable if you are slumped there in wellies as they will often volunteer to do the pulling off while you remain seated. Once the pulling off has been completed and your wellies lie limp and defeated in the corner, the strumpets can then go about removing your clothes whilst you assist them by licking off any excess warm butter that may have accrued in their crevices, for which they will no doubt be eager to show their gratitude in the traditional way.

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