Thursday, July 8, 2010

Fully-Consensual Over-Bananaing


Now all fully-consensual over-bananaing of an assistant librarian will – of course – depend on just how often you invite the flamingos around for tea, except on bank holidays, obviously.

This should not mean than the fence will have to remain un-creosoted for the duration of the event, but it does mean that any under-utilised cream cakes can be used later once the postmistress has been adjusted for British Summer Time and her suspender belt meets all current EU orgiastic specifications.

Now, if you are bowling form the Northern end of the orgy pitch and into the wind, don’t forget that the weasel racquets will need re-aligning before the fireman gets his hose out ready for any outpourings that the ladies request during the interval and half-time fully-consensual gropings.

The lemon meringue, though, should not be foisted upon any lady present without a fully-notarised consent form being lodged with the adjudicator before the first Wednesday immediately prior to oiling the stockbroker, unless – of course – you want to have your underwear impounded by the Naughtiness Police (again).

However, once you show them that you have no ethical objections to attempting to bribe officers of the law going about their business in an attempt to influence the course of justice, then they should almost immediately let you go free with little more than a verbal warning about your state of undress and a moderate probing of your crevices as mandated by the local by-laws.

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