The very chinstraps of our Lithuanian penguin annoyance capes are wont to chafe the inner thigh of our dental hygienists even though we still take a firm grip on our badger unguent ladles whenever the chiropodist rides into town. Still, as they say in these parts, ‘Good Afternoon’.
I see from the way that you have quite unconsciously adopted the stance of a supply geography teacher about to undertake the frank appraisal of a watermelon during a visit to a traditional local street market, that you are ready for this afternoon’s little adventure. So if you could just put that weasel down, we can begin.
Now, while you may have your own ideas about the best way to grate your cheese in an erotic context, I’m sure you know by now that Parmesan is ideal for a naked assistant librarian, provided you do not undertake any naughty activity too close to an open fire as the Parmesan has a tendency to melt and then set in what can be an intrusive and unfortunate manner, especially if the lady garden has been left un-pruned and allowed to grow wild – as it were.
Oh, hang on, my appliance has just fallen off the dildo rail and rolled under the chaise-lounge, where a brace of assistant librarian’s are helping the post mistress to grate some Double Gloucester over the rather proudly upstanding Strom Thighhammer, so if you will entertain this duck for a moment or two whilst I attempt to retrieve it I would be more than grateful and more than willing to grate a little Edam with you come the witching hour.