Thursday, August 26, 2010

Salad Undressing

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However, should you not have the mayonnaise to hand, for most assistant librarians a brand-name salad cream can sometimes be a last minute replacement. You should not, by any means, make a habit of this though, unless – of course – you are dressed as a monk* for the occasion.

A salad dressing is, advised for a cake shop manageress, or indeed for a bevy of dairymaids, especially in the case of the latter, utilising balsamic vinegar and – wherever possible extra virgin olive oil**

The slices of cucumber, however, must always be place in an anti-clockwise manner, especially if one is about to enter a dalliance with two or more ladies at once. You should also make sure that the radishes are with easy reach should they become necessary, especially when it becomes a little late in the season for the spring onions to be at their most pristine and crunchy. For if there is anything that will put a lady off a full salad undressing it is the sight of a putative dalliance partner approaching with his offering already wilting in his grasp.

 

*Or, for more specialised occasions – dressed as a nun.

** if you have trouble laying your hands on an extra virgin – as many of us do – then usually any nearby hot-buttered strumpet will do.

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