So, after only a fortnight of frantic string collection recalibration, you should be able to acquire access to the lug nuts that keep your codpiece firmly affixed to the suspender belt of your choice. Failing that, you ought to, at least, seriously consider taking out fully comprehensive anti-banjo insurance, if only for the up-coming* spring months.
Taking all that as read, let us move on towards outlining the business for today. Now, let me see….
Ah, there doesn't seem to be any business for today. So, if any of you have brought any games in with you, then you will be allowed to play them.
That is, of course, as long as they do not cause too much noise and any excessive cruelty to any elderly relatives you may also have about your person or in the close vicinity. Poking An Elderly Relative With A Stick Day is now long over, so you no longer have any excuse at all to be unnecessarily cruel or nasty to your elderly relatives, as you will then stand a chance of being disbarred from next year's event. And, as next year's Poking An Elderly Relative With A Stick Day is the bicentenary, special freestyle Crouching Stockbroker, Hidden Spatula event, it is one no-one in their right mind would want to risk disqualification.
So, while you all get on with that, then, I will get on with marking this year's final Water Vole Perplexation exams ready for the beginning of next term.
*And we all hope that you do.