Tuesday, February 8, 2011

The Importance of Unwinding

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Of course, once you have mounted your tandem, remembering - of course – to first dismount from your fully-satiated post mistress and/or cake shop manageress, you can make your way at a leisurely pace down the main street of Little Frigging. There is nothing quite as invigorating as riding your tandem to The Pervert’s Appendage, where – adequately ensconced in the snug – you can go about gently unwinding from a hard day of dalliances with the libation of your choice… and, of course, a bag of scratchings.

It goes without saying – even though – just to be on the safe side, I have said it – that one should always take some time to get over one’s dalliances, if one does not wish to get too overcome. This is – of course – why women have knitting and the advanced criticism of neighbours as a way of recovering from their exertions during their dalliances. This, even if it only mostly consisted of them staring up at the ceiling and wondering if there is a better colour it could be painted and reminding him to pull her nightie back down when he’s finished. Although why he should need reminding when there is usually only a few moments in time between him first raising it and having to lower it again is, many ladies have attested, one of the eternal mysteries of the universe.

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