Thursday, February 16, 2012

The Little Frigging Village Show

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Of course, like most rural villages in England the denizens of Little Frigging are not adverse to showing off the size of their plums and melons, the length of their marrows and any other such demonstrations of size and prowess at the annual village show.

However, during the winter months it is the size of a man’s sprouts that tend to occupy the thoughts of the ladies of the village, especially if exposed to a sharp frost. Many of the village ladies would say that a man’s sprouts nipped by the frost have a nicer flavour than those not so exposed.

Therefore, it is often the case that during these colder months the gentlemen of the village spend the frosty nights out in their fields, allotments, gardens or even their smallholdings exposing their sprouts to the elements in order to satisfy the cravings of the village ladies.

Come farmer’s market day, then, the ladies of the village are always very eager to peruse the displays put on by the proud sprout producers to check the quality of goods put out on display for their edification. Many of the more experienced women in the village (and most are very experienced indeed) claiming they can tell the quality of a man’s sprouts by mere touch and the way they respond to a robust fingering.

Once back home the ladies delight in dipping the fresh sprouts in warm butter before getting down to giving them a nibble before moving on to the rest of the main course laid out on the table ready for them to fully indulge themselves to the point of satiation.

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